I have postponed writing this entry as I was going to have to confront and put into words the results of what the Lord revealed to me while I was there. To begin, I will state that the trip to New Orleans was surreal. I was uncertain if I should even go or not because I didn’t know what feelings it would stir up being that I haven’t been back there since tying up several loose ends from my first marriage. However, as soon as the vehicle topped the bridge that overlooks the city, the Lord confirmed I was sitting in the same predicament I was in back then. A few months ago, I over heard someone talking about New Orleans and how they immediately felt the spirit of death there. Well, I concur…as it manifested itself in my life as the death of two love stories I tried to create instead of allowing the Lord to orchestrate and lead.
As I am writing this, the Lord is encouraging me to compare where I was spiritually back then to where I am now…. Well, before, I intentionally turned away from Him and towards things of the world for a distraction to deal with the shame and condemnation I felt. Now, I am running into His presence every opportunity I can to abide in His rest and I have been giving Him permission to heal several of those hidden places that I tried to heal the world’s way instead of His. I praise Him and thank Him that I know where my hope comes from and that He is my Comforter, my strength, and my Helper during this transition of endings, but yet new beginnings.